Meditations on desire

Desiring the asymptote

Imagine this: taking my hand...
Journeying with many Muses ...
Solitude with the elements.

Serenity, in the space of desire.
Midnight. A kiss.

Seduction is melting together.
Seduction is sweet dreams.

(for D, October 31, 2007,
originally from Meditations on desire)

Arboretum and Conservatory
April, 2007, from Space of desire

Walking at the arboretum
or in the woods
or at the Pinnacles.
Sunshine, mist or moonlight.

Visiting
(or remembering)
The Conservatory of Flowers.

What an anomaly
April, 2007, from Space of desire

Of all the inhabitants
Of the space of desire,
One stands out:

The one I've loved
And desired the most deeply,

In the most different ways.

My desire for her
Reflects back
And projects
In my desire for everybody else.

And my desire for everybody else
In turn
Reflects back on
And deepens
And intensifies
My desire for her.

For twenty-one years
I've shared the most with her,
Done the most with her,
Had the most fun with her,
Grown the most with her.
And
Spent the most time with her
In the space of desire.

What an anomaly.

Redefinitions

Art and beauty mold time and space.
It's "now" when I write this, when you read this,
Whenever we think or dream of each other.
And no matter the distance,
We can share sensations as well.
Close your eyes.
Whose fingers do you feel brushing against you?
Asynchronous immediacy. Remote physicality.
Pinch me feel me kiss me hold me.
Now.

(to Katia, april-may, 2006)
(originally in Meditations on desire)

I choose left

Soft hail. Large flakes. Mist.
Trees, forking paths; I choose left.
And then circle back.

(March 2007, originally in Meditations on desire)

Solitude

Power out.
Solitude.

Three candles,
Surrounded by a circle
Of votives and tapers:

Grounding.
Creating Sacred Space.
Seduction.

I light them ... and think of you
And us -- individually, collectively.

I think about how the thought of you (and us)
Grounds me.
Makes me aware of the sacred space that surrounds you.
Seduces me.

I think about how thoroughly you've seduced me,
And I think about the scrap of paper I found this afternoon
With the carefully-written equation
Love = trust pretty darn absolutely

I feel (or imagine) your presence.
In the air ... on my skin ...
In my mind ...
Throughout my being.

I remember (or imagine) other seductive times with you,
Grounded and sacred,
By candlelight
And other magic illumination.

I remember (or imagine)
The first time we met ... and the next ...
The first time we held hands,
The first time I told you I loved you,

Every moment we've spent together,
And all the moments with you I've remembered,
Imagined, replayed, anticipated,
And fantasized about.

And then I realize
I'm thinking too much
And watch the candles
And experience you.

-- December 15, 2006

Midnight

A kiss
At midnight

In a club,
A party
In private
Alone

Hearing
Or imagining
A voice
A memory

As we dance together,
Across the room,
Farther away,
Almost touching.

Sitting close to me
Or in bed.
Wearing lingerie.
Or nothing at all ...

Candlelight ...

Any and all of the above ...

(April, 2007, from Space of desire) (revised October 2007)

In the space of desire
April, 2007, from Space of desire

The people I'm there with
In their different ways
They are desire.

Any time I feel desire
It triggers thoughts

and feelings
and memories
of them
in different ways
on our intersecting paths.

The kind of desire I feel,
The environment,
The experiences,
The paths,
All remind me
Of different people
In different ways
And the desire I feel for them.

Whenever I think of desire, I think of them, in the space of desire, and desire them more.
Whenever I remember desire, I remember them, in the space of desire, and desire them more..
Whenever I dream of desire, I dream of them, in the space of desire, and desire them more..
Whenever I experience desire, I experience them, in the space of desire, and desire them more..

Whenever I am in the space of desire,
I think of them
Remember them
Dream of them
Experience them
And desire them more.